Update in September :)

Sometimes I just feel exhausted. Completely and utterly drained, body, mind and spirit. Usually this is when I have neglected my time with God, which I'm afraid has been the case. You would think that as a Moody student I would be drowning in His presence. But this is what I have learned: my studies at Moody, while they are extremely beneficial on so many levels to my spriritual growth, can never take the place of my personal devotions with my Lord.

I missed my simple Bible reading with my heavenly Father this week and I am going to strive not to do so again. My classes at Moody are wonderful, and I am learning so many challenging new things, but if I'm not keeping up my relationship with the very One I am learning about and striving to serve...it's all for naught.

So things have been crazy for me these last few weeks. A few changes to my schedule: I am no longer working full time at the mechanic shop, I only work part time. We are also no longer doing the Christmas choir this year due to the juggling of my other ministeries.

La Semilla tutoring has officially begun and is off to a great start. Pray for me! I have nine 3rd graders that I tutor Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays. Pray for knowledge of course, and also for creativity and wisdom as always. Their names are:
Delia
Vanessa
Karen
Danae
Edwin
Caesar
Christian
Alexis
George
I'll try to get a picture up soon!

Awana has also been kicked off (this last Tuesday). We have 6 girls in the class room I lead with Kara (my co-Awana leader and the director for our T&T girl's club). Pray that I would stay in God's word so that I can minister fully from Him.

Daughters of David dance group presented at one of our leader's (Vidalia) Quinceñera. They did a spectacular job! We had our first Parent's Meeting yesterday and I gave out the schedule for all the parents and we went over the rules and requirements for our dancers. All in all it went wonderfully. Praise God!

October 22nd the girls will be presenting a Woman's Conference so please be in prayer over this! Also pray that God would give an abundance of creativity and joy to our leaders in choreographing the upcoming dances. And wisdom (again) for me as I try to figure out how much to pull out and put into this Ministry in order for it to be effective and for neither my leaders nor me to become overwhelmed with the responsibilities.

That's all for September, blessings on everyone who reads this and does pray for me, my family and our ministeries. Bendiciones!

Forever and Always,

-Sarah

And The World Keeps Spinning

I have now been in Chicago for a little over a week. Meetings and plannings, interviews and schedules...my days weeks and months ahead are quickly filling up. Here's a snapshot of what I'll have on my plate:

• School: I have been accepted into Moody Bible Institute and I am currently enrolled in a program called 1+3. I am doing one year of a full load (16 credit hours) of online classes.
• Work: I just got hired at an auto shop by my house as a secretary. I'll be working full time (40 hrs) starting at minimum wage ($8.50 an hr.) Mondays, Fridays and Saturdays I'll be working 9-6 and Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays 9-2 because...
• Tutoring: La Semilla (the tutoring program at church) is being extended to 3 days from 3-5pm. I tutor a small group of kids and teach all the kids Bible.
• Dance: Thursday nights from 5:30-7:30 While I am still the leader for the Daughters of David our ministry is changing slightly so that I can pull out more and be much more of an overseer as my younger leaders handle more of the teaching.
• Awana: Tuesday nights from 7-8:30pm I am still a teacher in Awana for the 5th-7th grade girls
• Choir: From November-December I will again be leading a Christmas Musical in place of Awana and Dance.

It's a lot but very doable. Both school and work begin tomorrow. Prayers for this year are:

1) That I will learn to rely on the Lord for EVERYTHING

2) That my organizational skills will grow

3) That my perseverance will be stretched

4) For financial wisdom

5) That during Bible time I would be able to depict the accounts with accuracy and power

6) For deeper involvement in the lives of the children I am given

7) For contentment in circumstances and relationships

8) For humility in my ministries

9) For joy in every area of my life

10) For love for everyone I interact with

Goals:

1) I really want the Hayes to come regularly to church

2) Hopefully I can invite 2 other of my kids from tutoring to church, Christian and Joshua's families

It's going to be a VERY full year, but as always, I just have to remember that God is in control. And despite the craziness of my life the world keeps spinning as He holds the entire universe in the palm of His hand.

Forever and Always,

-Sarah

Mañana...

Regreso a mi ciudad mañana. Este viaje ha sido una adventura para los libros :) Me ha aprendiado mucho cerca de familia, español, ministerio y mi relacion con Dios. Hay mucho mas para aprender, pero este es un principio. Un paso que he dado que no he tomado antes. Mañana yo regreso a mi casa, mis amigos y mis ministerios, pero nunca olvidare mi tiempo aqui. Adios Mexico! Gracias para tus lecciones!

Goodbye orphanage

Pictures shall be uploaded soon! My camera got run over but I did save the memory chip! It was wonderful to work with such an amazing ministry! The dance that I taught went beautifully! The girls did an excellent job! They were so excited!

My last day I said goodbye to my friends that I had made and promised to try to keep in touch. For my friend Ara, one of the girls who I had gotten especially close to while working in the kitchen I asked my parents to bring a special gift, the DVD for the movie Newsies. We discovered that we were both fans and she had not seen it in a very long time. She was so happy! It was hard to say goodbye so we just said,"Hasta luego!" See you later.

All the kids were asking if I would come back, I told them to pray and ask God, but that I really wanted to. A prayer request for all of you: Maybe next year I can take a team...perhaps from my church or...the dance ministry girls...we'll see! All in God's timing!

Well thats done...

I deleted my Facebook account...and a few other things as well with that click of a button. It is a difficult decision to literally lay everything at the feet of Christ, your present, past and future, all your hopes, dreams, desires, passions and your love but that is what we are called to do...it is what we MUST do if we are to pursue a more passionate, intimate relationship with God. It is not something we can fake...it is also, I am finding not something that we can ease into as we feel more ready or prepared. No, this choice is one that must be made with eyes wide open, and a heart unwavering. It is an all or nothing decision that sets off a process of more such decisions, but it must have a beginning.

I love heights, perhaps because deep down inside I am truly fightened of them. But there is no other feeling that I love more than when you have gathered your courage to make a flying leap off a great height into a pile of snow, or water or just hitting the ground. That woosh as you leave the safety of the ground behind and take to the freedom of being suspended momentarily in midair always takes my breath away, leaving me giddy as I finally make contact with the ground below. It is completely terrifying and absolutely thrilling at the same time!

That first step of abandoning this world and mediocre Christianity is like that first jump off of a great height. Absolutely terrifying because of everything you can and will loose. And absolutely thrilling because you find yourself suspended in the hands of God, FREE.
You will return to earth, but on a higher plateu then before, and then it begins again, running to the edge, defeating the little sins in your life, speaking and acting out against the sin in the world, fighting and overcoming until there is only one more thing for you to overcome, another leap, not blind in any sense, but based on what you know to be true that He will catch you and carry you to the next height.

The adventure begins...safe return? Doubtful, I fully expect to die a martyr for my Lord, but advenuture? Promised!

There's no place like Home part 1

Mondays and Wednesdays from 9-2:30 I work at Esperanza Viva. It's been such an incredible experience, one that I hope I never will forget or take for granted. I have just gotten permission to take more pictures so hopefully the rest will be uploaded sometime next week.

So my first day at the orphanage had a slightly nerve wrecking beginning. I don't think I had slept more then four hours because I was so excited/nervous to finally begin! Excited obviously because I would once again be doing what I loved (working with kids) and nervous because my contact, Alejandra had informed me that I was a sort of experiment. Normally Esperanza Viva would have groups of small short term missions trips, usually no longer than one week come to work at the Home. But I would be working for a month. "We never do this." She told me about fifteen times. "You are the first person we allow this with, so we will be watching you and just so you know, we never do this." No pressure...

I arrived at the orphanage slightly early, and was given the run through of the rules by Alejandra. And once again I was told about the huge exception they were making for me to work for my time. I remember praying "Oh Lord please don't let me screw this up by doing something stupid." Most of the rules were things I had figured would be on the list, such as No Going To The Bathrooms With A Child, No Being Alone With A Child, things like that. Alejandra also told me I would not allowed to be taking pictures for a while, and I could not give the children any gifts, nor could I give them any means to contact me for the first few weeks.

"You will be working in the kitchen. For now, we are asking that you stay in the kitchen, and not interact too much with the kids. You are on a bit of a trial as we see how this works out, because we never do this and who knows? After a week or even after today we might ask you not to come back. I know that you wanted to teach a dance, and I don't want to be rude, but we love our kids and we have to protect them, so we'll first see how you do with this before we give you more." I assured her I understood. And with that I was sent to the kitchens

Working in the kitchens has been so amazing! I get to talk with the other girls who work there, (most of them are 19 as well) and they have been helping me to improve my Spanish. There were a few days when I did feel a little disappointed not to be working hands on with the children but I reminded myself that God was in control. I started using my time in the kitchen to pray for the kids as I was cooking and this grew my faith and my joy as I worked.

Then, last week I was taken aside by Alejandra. She told me she had been talking to the girls I worked with and they had told her I had been a great help in the kitchen. She said, "We are so happy that you have obeyed all of our rules, so we are going to let you teach the girls a dance."

I was so happy! I went home singing "Our God Is Greater" and thinking about the dance. Since that day I've been splitting my time from working in the kitchen to teaching about 15 girls a praise dance a long with a Bible study at the end of each practice. We practice outside in a spot where there is absolutely no shade for 2 hours at a time. It's hard on the girls who are not used to practicing so much in such conditions. But they are doing an excellent job! Please continue to pray for us!

For myself: creativity, patience, overflow of joy and wisdom as always as I teach the Bible study.

For the girls: patience (with me!), endurance, overflow of joy and understanding of the lessons

A wonderful praise note is that I am teaching the lessons half in English and half in Spanish. My wonderful helper Aurora is not completely fluent in English so we switch back and forth. Praise God! He is helping me bridge this language gap!

Below are some pictures I was able to take at the Inauguration of the new dormitories that were just built, along with some information on the orphanage itself. Enjoy!

These are the gates to the Home

The buses that take the kids to church

The older kids did a few traditional dances that a man from the Nation's Church (the church affiliated with the ministry) taught them

The new dormitories!

There are four bedrooms, each bedroom has six sets of bunk beds. All the blankets are the same, but each child has their own personal pillow. The kids are divided by younger boys, older boys and younger girls, older girls. The younger children live on the first floor and the older kids live on the second.

Quite a few of the single supervisors live 24/7 at Esperanza Viva and sleep with the children. The bed on the left is the supervisor's bed and the bunk bed set are for any smaller children that might need help at night, there is also a crib on the other side for any babies.

The Doctor's Office

The Offices where the administrators for Esperanza Viva work (the people were from the tour we were on)

Computers for the kids to do homework on are also in another part of their rooms

There are 4 bathrooms, 2 on each floor. In this picture of the tour, Kate (our tour guide and one one of the main administrators at Esperanza Viva) was telling us how all of the tile and sinks was donated to the ministry. "It is really top quality tile as well. We would have never been able to afforded it on our own, but it is truly amazing how God provides. These children are HIS children and he has given them the best."

These are the classrooms for the school. The children rotate, depending on their jobs and activities for school hours.

Desks for the older children that might be more independent

Teacher's desk

Desks for the younger children who might need more help one on one. Working in tents is not easy. In the summer we were told it gets so hot sometimes it's like working in a sauna and they have to do school outside in the grass. In the winter, or when it's raining during hurricane season it can be very cold and too windy to hear what the instructor is saying.

Laundry room for around 100 children.

One more thing that I want to mention. A correction on my part. While Esperanza Viva is referred to as an orphanage, it is not. The children who come to live at Esperanza Viva come to stay. Many of them have families that visit on the weekends. Most of the children have come to live at the Home because of poverty in their family. One of my friends from the kitchen told me that she has many brothers and sisters but only she, her sister and 2 brothers came to live at the Home.

It is a very difficult ministry, one that requires everything of the supervisors and administrators who serve in it. Please keep praying for them! The two pictures below are of the team of people who work at the Home on a daily bases.

Thanks for reading! I'll be posting again soon, my time here is almost up. God has been good! He has taught me many things about ministry, serving Him and quite about about myself as well. Hasta pronto mis amigos! Bendiciones a todo!

Forever and Always,

-Sarah

To The Orphanage I Go!

Hey everyone!

Sorry I haven't updated lately, it has been a little confusing trying to get a date nailed down for my first visit to the orphanage. But we finally have it! Mark it down: July 4, will be my FIRST official day working at the orphanage...we hope!

You see, I some how contacted a slight cold, which turned into a slight infection, but I'm taking medicine for it, however if I am not better by Sunday I'll have to tell them I won't be able to come for the safety of the children. Prayers are greatly appreciated as you can imagine!

I went to the grand opening of the new dormitories last Saturday and the benefit dinner on Sunday. I'll be posting pictures, it was so wonderful to hear the vision of the ministry! The hearts of the pastor and staff are so sold out to the loving and discipleship of the children they serve! It was so beautiful to hear them speak with such passion for their calling!

Sorry for this being such a short post, but it's late and I need to get my rest, but I will say one more thing, what I consider to be the most beautiful: The Garden of Hope

The Garden of Hope is a beautiful simple garden located just outside the new dormitories. There are 3 stone pillars surrounding it, and on them are written the names of the many people who have given $1000 or more to the ministry. There are names from all over the world! Churches, families, single people whom God has placed on their hearts to give.

The pastor said that the Garden of Hope was a very special place because it was the first place they would take a new child who came to the Home. They would take them to see the stone pillars and tell them, "Do you see those names? Those are the names of all the people who are praying for you. Those are the names of all the people who believe in you. You are no longer alone." Those last words touched me so much I started to cry as I looked at the beautiful faces of the children who were standing beside the pillars.

Jesus loved children! Oh how it must break his heart that there are approximately 100,000,000 children living on the streets around the world! If reading this small piece has moved your heart to give towards the orphanage financially here is the link by which you may do so http://www.lovehopemercy.org/giving.asp Also, only 2 of the pillars are inscribed so far, because Living Hope Community is not yet complete. The new dormitories for the children to live are only phase one of their vision. There is still MUCH to accomplish! But for $1000 or more, your name could be one of those inscribed on the third pillar.

I will be posting pictures tomorrow along with a little more information on the Esperanza Viva and their vision. Blessings!

Forever and Always,

-Sarah

4 Songs :)

So....remember in my last post how I said when my feelings exceed my ability with words I post songs? That's the case today so I'm posting 4 songs instead of a long blog entry.

Was feeling down about stuff:

Remembering my purpose:

Keeping my eyes on the goal:

Going back to my commission:

A Journal Entry 6.15.2011

Romans 3:12

They have all turned away, they have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one.

Dear Journal,

Only one verse tonight, but it’s hitting me hard. I know that God is in control of everything and omnipotent, but He also has emotions. And those last three words: Not even one… perhaps this could be considered a form of blasphemy, but it almost sounds broken hearted.

Not even one… The picture that comes to my mind is our Lord Jesus as he draws his last breath on the cross. And the world mocking and jeering at their savior. Not even one…

Not even one… I also see the church buildings that have been converted into shopping centers, bars, night clubs and more. Once beloved places of worship filled with people and singing and the treasured words of the Gospel spilling from their doors…now empty and silent. Not even one…

And my own heart. I see myself turning away, turning away from what I know is right. Committing adultery against my Savior by giving my heart away. I don’t want to be worthless! I don’t want to disappoint my Lord. It truly, truly is the deepest most ancient desire of my heart to live and die as he would have me.

Not even one… I want to be like Noah! I want to be like Abraham! I want to be like Deborah! I want to be like Mary! When no one was left who would do God’s will they stood firm. I want to be like Isaiah and Samuel, and when God calls my name I want to answer with all my heart, “Here I am, Lord! Your servant is listening!” And when he asks whom he shall send to the nations, the ghettos, the deepest, darkest, dirtiest holes of the earth that I would answer without hesitation, “SEND ME!” And that I would never, never, never look back!

Now, I'm the type of person that normally thinks in songs or music, and right now the song that is playing through my mind right now is a song I learned a Looooooooong time ago from Sunday School. It's always been my outlet for when my own words are no longer adequate to express the depth of emotion or the resolution of a decision to write down the lyrics of a song that does. So with that being said, I'll sign off with this simple song. My pledge and my psalm to my Lord.

I have decided to follow Jesus

I have decided to follow Jesus

I have decided to follow Jesus

No turning back, no turning back

The world behind me the cross before me

The world behind me the cross before me

The world behind me the cross before me

No turning back, no turning back

Though none go with me, still I will follow

Though none go with me, still I will follow

Though none go with me, still I will follow

No turning back, no turning back

…..Not even once!

Forever and Always,

-Sarah

Vasos y Montañas

...I'm very tired! Been staying up until midnight some nights with my cousins and waking up at 6:30 to see them off to school. Of course this is all my choice, but that doesn't take away from the exhaustion I feel right now haha.

On the bright side, tengo un nueva amiga. Se llama Mari Carmen y ella tiene nuevo años. Ella es un ballerina en el grupo de danza de mi prima. She's such a little sweet heart and has firmly attached herself to me. During breaks she'll come sit next to me and talk a whole mess of words in Spanish pausing every now and then to allow me to answer a question, during which times I fumble and stutter out a half Spanish half English answer to which she will laugh and correct and continue on. At the end of each class she tells me, "Hasta proxima clase Sarah! Adios!" At least that I understand. Also the chirpy "Hola Sarah!" I receive from her along with a hug at the beginning of each class.

It surprises me that even though I've probably only spoken a handful of correct understandable Spanish words she still seems to genuinely like me and as I said, has attached herself to my person. In Chicago I've become used to being quickly accepted by children, but I've always accredited this to my ability to level in speech. I don't have that privilege here. I'm forced to communicate with half sentences, key words and a LOT of sign language.

And that's another thing! When it comes to sharing the gospel, I've always been able to rely on the techniques I've learned from Home Schooling, Child Evangelism Fellowship, Awana, VBS and teaching Sunday School. I know of course that I can never save a person. And even my words are given by God, but now it's in a different light. I realize just how true it is that we are vessels. That I am just an empty vessel. Without God's help I can't even preach His Word.

Here all my words in English mean nothing. Absolutely nothing. I have to rely TOTALLY on his help. Does this make me feel weak and insignificant? Chyeah! But He is strong. Do I feel lost and stupid? You bet! But He is holding me in the palm of His hand and has declared his everlasting love for me.

Psalm 103:11 "For as high as the heavens are above the earth so great is his love for those who fear him."

This trip is different from any other venture God has taken me on in that I find myself in a place where I feel so inadequate! Learning this language is beginning to seem more and more like the mountains that surround Puebla. Huge and immovable!

But do you know what is beautiful? Looking up at those mountains is exactly what gives me hope, because of two passages I memorized when I was in Awana.

Psalm 121:1-2 "I will lift my eyes to the hills, where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, maker of heaven and earth."

Matthew 17:20 "...I tell you the truth, if you have faith the size of a mustard seed you can move MOUNTAINS. Nothing will be impossible for you.

Until next time dear reader!

Arrival and The Wizard of Oz

YES!!! I made it safe and sound to Mexico! Thank you to everyone who was praying for me! My God is good, everything went smoothly and he even took away my butterflies before our flight!

So now here I am in my family's home with my wonderful cousins. For our first day of attempting to communicate I think we did pretty well! They are able to figure out what I mean when I can't translate certain worlds to Spanish some of the time and I find I am able to do the same with them. There's a lot of laughing when none of us quite know how to explain something. I think we are going to become great friends by the time I leave though!

And now for the Wizard of Oz part: My prayer list! In an easy to remember manner :D I actually got this as a card from a dear friend before I left Chicago and it was so good I just had to share it with ya'll!

Now hopefully most of the people reading this have seen the Wizard of Oz because if not haha this is going to make NO sense but if that is the case just follow me on this I'll do my best not to sound like too much of a nut ;)

So I embarked on this adventure much like our fictional friends, in search and in high hopes of obtaining a few things.

1. Scarecrow - Brains - For Learning Spanish

Just like our friend was searching for his smarts, I am here primarily to learn Spanish so that I will be able to speak to the families of my kids in La Villita

2. Tin Man - Heart - For My Lord/For His People

This one actually has two: Pray that I would grow more solid in my relationship with God and that I would have compassion and love for the children at the orphanage

3. Lion - Courage - For Making Mistakes

It's gonna happen, and it's got to happen, pray for courage!

4. Dorthy - Faith - For Challenges

And pray that I would be challenged while I am here! As one author wrote: Real gold fears no flame. However those challenges come, pray that I would face them with unfaltering faith in the Most High God!

So there you have it! I love comments! Hopefully I'll be posting pictures soon!

3-2-1 MEXICO!

Hey!

That's right! In 3 days people, THREE DAYS I will be flying to Mexico where I will be living with extended family for 2 months. Now, if you've read my profile you'll have noticed that I list Mexican and Spanish as part of my nationalities unfortunately I only understand about 35% of spoken Spanish on my good days and I am able to respond correctly (with the right vocab and grammar) only about 20% of the time.

Now for a person who is intent on living and working in the largest Hispanic community of Chicago this is a serious problem (ya think?)! You see, while the children I tutor and mentor are mostly bilingual, very few of their parents are, and while at this point in my life my focus is mainly on the children, my desire is to minister to the families as a whole, and of course this is only more difficult with the obvious language barrier.

I knew God was calling me to La Villita when I was beginning my Senior yr. of high school. After I had graduated I took a year off to focus on my ministries while taking Spanish 101 and 102 at the community college in my area. But I knew that I was not going to learn the language unless I was completely immersed in the language.

I spoke with my parents about living with my grandparents in Mexico (who do not speak English) for 2 months. They agreed with me on the notion that I would learn faster if it was a matter of survival (haha). My mom then suggested that I look up some churches in the area and try to make contact to arrange for some service I could participate in so that I would not be idle or wasteful of my time. In the end, through some contacts at my church I found out about a Christian run orphanage located close to my grandparents home. They agreed to let me come and serve with them for part of my time.

And so my dear reader, here I stand on the brink of my departure. I have not been to Mexico in 11 yrs and, with the exception of my grandparents, have not seen most of my family down there for the same amount of time. It will be an adventure, that's certain! But I go with the Lord so all will turn out well :)